Great start to the week...

Today did actually start of really well.
Its my way in day on a Monday so this morning I stepped on the scales full of dread thinking about all the crap I shovelled down my throat this weekend [ok I did sick most of it up] and amazingly, I have lost another 3 lbs! WOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

So I went to work feeling good about myself and glad Id shifted some more of the fat. I had a healthy breakfast and lunch, sticking well to my Weight Watchers points.

After work tonight, I was supposed to be meeting my old workmates for tea [I started a new job about 5-6 weeks ago], anyway for some reason as they day went on, I started to feel more and more nervous about meeting them all after not seeing them for a few weeks and panicking about eating in fron of them all. I really dont know why. I had been looking forward to it for ages, and Ive spent the last 2 and a half years eating infront of them [ok most of the time they only ever saw me eat vegetable soup] but I just couldnt stop thinking about it.

Anyway, now Im sat at home on my own feeling miserable yet again because I cancelled telling them I had gone to my car to discover it had been vandalised by stupid little chavs and I couldnt come as I was sorting it out. [Thats actually true, except that happened this morning before I went to work but they joy of losing 3 more pounds drowned the anger a little.]

Instead of the healthy veg chilli I was going to make for tea, I made a big fat curry with naan bread and rice, have eaten 3 packets of crisps, a massive bar of Galaxy, pork pie and peperami!

I am so annoyed with myself, Im such a bloody idiot and hate myself for doing it. But at the same time, I have a different feeling, as though its my special little thing. Almost like an old friend, I dont know if that even makes sense. I dont know how to word it?

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